The Devil’s Time

I would like to speak firmly with the jerk that invented Daylight Savings Time.  I recently heard of someone who called it “The Devil’s Time.”  I couldn’t agree more.  I didn’t really have strong feelings one way or the other until I had children.  The problem with DST is that it ruins naptime.  When naptime is ruined, everything is ruined.  Bedtime is also ruined.  It doesn’t seem like it would be a big deal right?  Wrong. 

I suspect that Benjamin Franklin invented Daylight Savings Time.  While he had a lot of great ideas, he also flew a kite in a thunderstorm so obviously he was a ding dong and perhaps we should take some of his brilliance with a grain of salt.  I mean, we can’t all be brilliant all of the time!  Apologies to Mr. Franklin if it wasn’t him.  I really just need someone to blame right now.

Today was especially rich.  Miriam misunderstood Daylight Savings Time entirely and thinks it means that we should get up earlier and go to bed later and not bother that much with naps.  I guess we can get more farming in if we do it that way.  Young master agrees.  He didn’t even come close to a nap today but not from lack of effort on my part.  I put in a great deal of effort.  I fetched pacifiers and blankets, read books, sat quietly, fetched water, patted rear ends, etc.  I left him alone for a while.  He sang about Thomas and his grandma.  It is very possible that he was singing a song about his grandma coming on Thomas the Train to rescue him from his nap.  We all just gave up around 3:15.  I should have sent him outside to hoe.

We all know that a small child without a nap is like a shark that smells blood.  Instead of blood, they can sense things that need to be broken, spilled, or entirely destroyed.  There were baby sisters to be pushed over.  There were cups of water to spill.  A great number of things got thrown unceremoniously into the bath tub.  The cat’s tail was pulled a number of times.  I even felt sorry for Rugby and we all know how I feel about Rugby.

A toddler’s temperament is like a very sensitive scale.  The slightest thing could tip the scales and send the whole day into a tailspin.  I think a slight hat problem was what really turned the tables on today.  It was slightly askew or something.  Fast forward six hours to mummy throwing a cup across the room after the water that was once safely inside the cup was dumped out all over electronic equipment, books, and wallets.  I’ll just let you imagine the time in between.  It was no picnic. 

Other things that might send your toddler into hysterical fits is the lack of crackers, the wrong kind of crackers, putting shoes on or taking them off, going outside, not going outside, or the wrong kind of “cold water.”  His sister looked at his trains which was literally the worst thing she could have done.  It caused him to have to go and flush the toilet twelve times. 

Side note:  I had to buy new sunglasses today because I do not guard my sunglasses with enough vigilance and they get broken often.  This is why I wear $10 sunglasses.  There was a big, embarrassing drama when I wouldn’t let him break my sunglasses immediately after I purchased them.  I am very, very mean.

Finally, I must complain about the fact that I am not tired when I should be and am now in a vicious cycle of going to bed too late which wouldn’t be all that late if old Benny hadn’t gone around carelessly trying to change nature.  If there is one thing I know, it is that Mother Nature is not to be messed with.  You don’t go around meddling with natures or else she meddles with naptime. 




5 thoughts on “The Devil’s Time

  1. My 22 month old has refused to nap three times this week following the Devil’s Time change. The boy still ain’t sleeping through the night and Mommy NEEDS that nap. And what is up with their snooty attitude toward crackers?? Am I supposed to know that you crying while pointing at your plate means that you want to dip your crackers in ketchup? Definitely sending him out to perform hard physical labour if he refuses to nap tomorrow. Thanks for bringing a smile to my craptastic day.

  2. Very often, when tides start turning, great gears start shifting, and gusting winds start blowing at the onset of a really wonderful dream’s alignment with your present life, there is commotion, unpredictability, even turmoil.

    So hey, let’s always assume that’s the case whenever you experience commotion, unpredictability, even turmoil. K?

    Let not your senses deceive, for even as the tempest may howl, just beyond it lies a serenity that could not otherwise find you. The storm before the calm, if you will.

    Did the Devil’s Time and the Spring Equinox usher in these winds?

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